Monday, October 22, 2007

Bloggy Q&A Part 1

Well, today is the day for the A part of my attempt at the good ol' Q&A session, bloggy style. This has been so much fun, if you've never done this on your own blog, you should think about it! And let me know, so I can come ask you something!

Here we go...

Heidi asks Do I let my kids read my blog and does my husband read it?

My kids do not read it, not that I would not let them if they asked, I just don't think they've really noticed. I usually rendezvous with my laptop at night, after everyone has gone to bed. I always keep in my mind that everything I write I hope that they will read someday, so I try to be very honest as well as not get into the petty day to day stuff. Like 'So and so really ticked me off because she thinks her kid is better than my kid, oh yes, she does.'

Or things like that, that happen to be equally as petty, such as the very large scratch I managed to put in the side of my car while pulling into my own garage last week. And I won't even say who was responsible for not having the lawn mower over to the side far enough so that I wouldn't hit it.

Because it was me.

This blog is about the big picture of my life for my children and grandchildren to see in the years to come, so I like to focus on the important stuff. Feelings, fears, things I find humor in, a great pair of jeans, you know what I am talking about...things that matter. Not so necessary that they remember me fondly as the crazy lady who got into a tugging match at The Children's Place over the last sweater coat that I had to have for one of my darlings.

Cause although I do love me a good lookin' sweater coat, I don't want that to be my legacy.

I just want them to read this so they will know me and the me that is in my brain, if that makes any sense. When I was pregnant with my first daughter I was always wondering if after I became a mom I would still feel like me. And sure enough, I was a woman in my mid twenties with a newborn who still never missed an episode of 90210. Ever. In her whole life. Still me.

So yes, I had reassurance early on that becoming a mother does not exactly mean you are a full fledged-grown up, especially if now, almost 10 years later, you still watch the occasional 90210 rerun on SoapNet.

I once read great advice from Big Mama, it was something like 'Think of the last person in the world that you would want to see your blog, and don't write anything you wouldn't want them to see.'

Words to live by.

As for my husband, he reads now and then over my shoulder, and I think he may check in occasionally from work, but really I think he thinks I am wasting my time. He doesn't get the whole 'sense of community' thing that comes with sharing notes from the trenches with other mom bloggers.

But then again, he leaves the house everyday and talks to other adults, too.

He is such a great guy, and has always supported me 100% in everything I've ever done, so I think while he doesn't understand it, he is okay with it because I am having fun. And no, I don't usually give him the same respect on things he likes to do.

I believe I already stated that I was not exactly a full-fledged grown up yet.

Stie, asked me If I could trade places with anyone, who would it be and why?

This is a great question, and I've given it a lot of thought. At first I thought I'd love to be Faith Hill or Angelina Jolie or Oprah or even the President for the day. Read between the lines here...I want to be beautiful and rich and famous and have people wait on me. Hand and foot. And have good clothes, and be airbrushed in pictures.

But then I thought about something a little um...less shallow? And I decided I really just would like to trade places with someone who is a philanthropist. Someone who has more money than they know what to do with, and all of it just to give away. You know the saying it is better to give than to receive? I believe it. Wholeheartedly. I love to give people things. It makes me feel good. And I don't need a thing in return. Just seeing someone happy when they receive something I gave them, is enough for me. I wish I had buckets and buckets of money and I would just spend my days jetting around the world giving out things to people in need.

I would forgo the foundations and trusts and the red tape of grants and endowments. I'd be a one woman money giving machine. I would pull up to an orthodontists' office and when a mom walked in with 4 kids and 2 in braces at the same time, I'd understand that it is sometimes a struggle to make that monthly payment for two sets of braces. I would give her a check to pay her balance off. When I saw a mom at the grocery store, trying to get the shopping done, wrangle in her children who are running amok in the store, while she is still trying to price compare and check her coupon book, I'd say 'Here, let me take the kids for you so you can shop in peace. And here is a check. Don't worry about the grocery budget this week. Buy what you need.' That should ease her burden a little.

Then, I'd find that Vietnam, or Gulf War or Iraq War veteran sleeping under Lower Wacker in the cold and buy him a coat and say 'Thank you. Now what can I do for you? You deserve better.' I'd pay for college for someone who was thinking about taking out student loans. I'd build a house, for someone who'd lost their own to a tornado or a hurricane. Then I would jet to Ethiopia and give whatever amount necessary so that no woman, no child, no human being ever had to endure this again. I'd travel to the American Indian reservations, and help these native Americans, 33% of whom live below the poverty level and as much as 50% of whom are alcoholics. I would knock on their door and say 'let's get you some help.' I might then travel to the orphanages of India and figure out some way to get the flies off of those poor children and food in their bellies. I'd save the world, one orthodontic bill and mosquito net, at a time. Because when I see all of this going on in the world around me, I feel helpless. So just once, I'd like to be able to really help.

And before you start thinking what a great, selfless, and noble person I am, I'd also buy this, for myself.

This purse. Long coveted by me. At only $1800.00 from Valentino, a generous, jet-setting philanthropist like myself would surely deserve it.

Beth wanted to know if I could have someone decorate my house would it be Nate Berkus or Martha Stewart?

Couldn't I just have both? Because assuming I can afford an interior decorator I probably have more than one house that needs decorating.

I love Martha. Sorry, I just do. I know she has her faults, I know she's a not so nice employer, and I know she's an ex-con and all, but she has herself some great taste. Classic, elegant, ritzy. When I was first married, I was working nights so I had time to watch daytime TV, and I got hooked on watching her old TV show every single day. This was before the magazine and all the products she designs, back when she was just a show on cooking, gardening, and the Good Things.

So when I would cook dinner I would be standing in my kitchen , talking to only my dog, and pretending that I was doing my own little cooking show, a la Martha. Yes, I'm weird. I even had the yelloware bowls to prove it. But if I am admitting this, you must know that I am being honest. I stood there whisking away some creme sauce with fresh home grown herbs and adding a splash of cooking wine to my concoction and I would be talking out loud giving my viewers, umm, I mean my dog, a play by play. I was the original Food Network.

The thing is, even though I just revealed my undying admiration for Martha, I'd choose Nate.

Martha's decorating style is too perfect, and I'm afraid I'd never keep it up. Nate seems to decorate more in consideration with how people actually live. And we live pretty casual in this house. And Nate loves Pottery Barn. And Nate is a Chicago boy, so how can I not go with Nate?

And my husband's company sublets their downtown office from Nate, who since he got famous and all, has moved on to bigger and better spaces. So I am married to the guy who knows the realtor who works with the lawyer who brokered the sublet with the other lawyer who actually works for Nate Berkus.

So really, we are practically BFF's. How could I not pick Nate?

Beth also wants to know if I am ever going to attend a NW Indiana bloggy meet up because apparently there's more than corn in Indiana. There's really cool blogging chicks, too!

And the answer to that would by why yes, as soon as I have lipo and a nose job and my eyes lifted. And loose weight. And tone my upper arms. And have good hair. And get that Valentino bag. I will be there.

Okay, so that is not my answer. Well, it is, but I do remember I said that I tried not to focus on being petty in this blog.

I will definitely come as soon as a I can, because I would love to share laughs and chips-n-guac with all of you gorgeous local bloggers in person.

Jen asked me three great questions. Where is your dream vacation destination?

Mexico. No question. Vacation there whenever possible. My husband and I hope to retire there. Friendly, laid back people, great language, fantastic food, awesome climate, the beach and only a 3 hour plane ride away from home. Perfect.

What do you do for fun now that doesn't involve your children?

I go out with my friends. I have an awesome group of friends that I get together with at least once a month. I love them all. They make me laugh so hard and are good, genuine people. We can do anything from go to a haunted house, to stay in and play pictionary, or even hit a local dive for a beer, and I, without fail, laugh until my stomach hurts. Every time. You don't find friends like that very often.

I also spend time alone. As an only child, living in a house with five other people still, to this day, can stress me out. So being alone, for me, is fun. Just to watch TV, or go to the library or do anything that gives me quiet, I consider to be fun. I need my alone time. I usually spend some of it dancing around my house singing "I'm by my-se-elf. I'm by my-se-elf."

Lastly, my husband and I take a trip by ourselves together once a year. Sometimes it's exotic, like Mexico or Hawaii, other times it's a road trip to see my husband's family in New Orleans. It just doesn't matter. I love a good road trip as much as a trip to the beach. Which I really, really, really love. I can't think of anything more fun than being with my husband out on a road trip, because he makes me laugh. And laughing is fun.

And Jen's last question, What was I like before I had children? My job, hobbies, great vacations, etc.?

Why, I rocked of course. What else do you need to know?

Actually Jen, this was such a good question that I am going to do a separate post on it in the future. It will be good for me to record all of that for my future generations of offspring to read.

Fernando Down Under jokingly asked if I was pregnant with number 5?

Ha Ha. No, no and no. In fact I am surgically unable to have any more kids! By choice.

I always thought I'd have six kids, but it is hard to be the kind of mom to 4 that I want to be, so I think it was a good number to stop at. I am finally at peace with my decision, but I did have some doubts early on. It is hard finding individual time with each of them, giving them the attention they need, paying for all of their extra curricular activities, and saving for their college. Plus with 4, eating out is expensive, travelling is expensive as well as food, clothes, etc. We just couldn't give them the kind of life that we felt like they deserved if we kept adding more mouths to feed, so to speak. I stopped at 4 because I needed to be a good mom to the kids I already had, rather than just trying to make it to some number I had in my head for whatever reason.

Kari wanted to know what is my least favorite household chore? And with 4 kids, how many loads of laundry I do each week.

To be honest with you, I don't mind housework all that much. It is finding the time to do it, that I really struggle with. I am very fortunate to have had a cleaning lady off and on for the past 7 of the 9 years I've been home with my kids. If I had to pick one, my least favorite chore would be emptying the canister of the vacuum. I hate that job. We have the hairiest floors, our dog is a Golden Retriever, and if I don't vacuum daily clumps of hair can be seen blowing across the floor if there is a breeze. So the daily vacuuming I do, but daily emptying of the vacuum, I dread. I probably only do it once every few weeks, until the vacuum is not sucking up anything. And by then the nasty's are all so wedged in there I am banging it on the side of the garbage can. Then the dust starts flying in the form of a dark cloud all over my kitchen floor and by then I'm coughing and hacking like I've been a smoker for 40 years. So yeah, that would be my least favorite chore. I couldn't decide wheather to say the vacuum, or picking up the dog's business in the back yard. But I really didn't want to get into much detail on that, so I went with the vacuum. Just know that they are pretty much equally gross.

Laundry? I wish I had a weekly total for you, but it is never all done at the same time. It is about 16 loads per week, counting sheets, towels, coats that have gotten dirty, etc. But the truth is I am never caught up. When I am very desperate I've been known to pack it all up and go to the laundromat. It accomplishes two things, the laundry gets done and I get some time alone. Except for the two things I mentioned above, sorting, doing and putting away laundry is my least favorite thing to do. LEAST. FAVORITE. I would rather just not think about it for 3 weeks and then go to the laundromat and knock out about 44 loads in one shot.

As a matter of fact, I did just that last week. I am a model of efficiency.

So that's first installment of the Bloggy Q&A. I had so many great questions, I couldn't get them all in on this one post, so check back on Wednesday and I'll have the rest of the answers for you!

I know the suspense, the anticipation, it really must be almost too much for you.

Thanks for playing!


Kristy said...

"And I decided I really just would like to trade places with someone who is a philanthropist. Someone who has more money than they know what to do with, and all of it just to give away."

I love this! How fun it would be just to give money wherever you see the need for it. I so want to do that.

Family Adventure said...

These Q&As are AWESOME.

Great answers, too.

I find it really interesting that you, as an only, wanted six but ended up with four children. There's gotta be a story there somewhere?

Best of luck with everything this week. I am thinking about you and looking forward to reading some good news.

And I'm looking forward to installment numero dos in the Q&As.

Hugs, Heidi

SnapHappyInkyMomma said...

I'm with you on the laundry. I actually don't mind doing it per se . . . it's the folding and putting it away!

I love bringing it to the laundromat, though . . . we once had a broken washer and I had to do that. I enjoyed the anonymity of it (not going to run into anyone I know there . . . ) and the time away from the family!!!! Sometimes I decide my kids need their comforters cleaned just so I can use the industrial washers there . . .

ValleyGirl said...

Good answers and a good read! Once you're done redecorating, send your BFF on up here to the great white north to my house, okay?!

Stie: My Favorite Things said...

Love it! Very good choices all around (and yes, the first thing to buy would be that gorgeous purse, but only if you buy one for me, too)

PLO said...

You are hysterical. Did I spell that right? When I win the lottery, and I will...I promise to buy you that bag.

Jennifer (Jen on the Edge) said...

That is some serious writing. Hundreds and hundreds of words. Do your fingers hurt from all that typing?

Thanks for answering my questions. I can't wait to read the final one.

Jenny from Chicago said...

Awesome post. Awesome idea. I wish I'd been here the other day so that I could have submitted a question. I'm just recovering from two weeks of unbelievable business. I won't let the next one slip by me.

I Should Be Folding Laundry said...

I love this! I'm glad you chose Nate. I had no idea you two were so close. I mean, maybe since I live near Chicago he and I are like second cousins twice removed? We should totally go to the Cheesecake Factory sometime together. Just you, me and Nate.

And you are silly. If I can go to a bloggy meet-up, anyone can. okay? No lipo or nose jobs necessary. In fact, if you are pretty, we won't like you. (don't tell Jenny from Chicago)

Lisa@Take90West said...

Jen...I know it was wordy! I couldn't believe it.
Know one would ever believe in real life that I'm not much of a talker!
Thanks for hanging in there!

Beth, yes, I really am your connection for all things Nate. Just let me know and I'll have my people call his people to set up that lunch.

Jenny...good to hear from you! Glad you survived the craziness of all you had going on.

And PLO...I am holding you to that purse offer. I'd even carry a purse with a skull on it if you bought it for me. :)

chickadee said...

i loved the martha vs nate question. good one. that would be a tough call for me too but i'd probably go with nate. though i'd be embarrassed for him to be in my house.

i'm just now adding you to my bloglines so i can always be caught up.

Mary@notbefore7 said...

That was fun.

You crack me up.

Yes, it is 4 AM and I am waiting for the soy formula and pedialyte to return with my hubby. D is up again.

I am not sure I am gonna make it. BUT you made me laugh. So, today - you rock!

Darcy said...

The Q&A was a fun read....I laughed a lot! Looking forward to Part 2.

new diva on the blog said...

Looks like this was a lot of fun and you did have some great questions.

My husband is usually my editor. I just feel like a need another set of eyes to look at what I have written before I unleash it on the world.

Rich enough to give a lot of it away and good looking too. Sounds like a plan to me!

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