Saturday, December 1, 2007

Apparently, my size has misled my husband into thinking I should give a good massage

K hurt his back at work yesterday. I actually feel bad for him, he is wincing enough to have me convinced that he is really not faking. Which would not be such a stretch for him, considering we had planned to go and chop down a Christmas tree today. And Christmas is not one of K's favorite times of year.

Apparently, he is not a fan of hemorrhaging money. Except of course, when it comes to something he really wants. Like a Wii.

Anyway, this morning he said his back was really stiff and would I mind rubbing it for him?

So I started rubbing his back, doing my best imitation of a therapeutic massage. Because we are in this together. When he hurts, I hurt. In sickness and in health, and all that jazz.

I tried.

But apparently I give crappy massages. Because K has had so many sessions with a professional masseuse that he would really know what constitutes a crappy massage or a good massage. Right.

Apparently he was a bit disappointed in my skills as a masseuse. Apparently, I give wimpy massages "like I weigh a hundred pounds or something."

I think he was expecting a little bit more from a relative of the Michelin Man.

4 comments:

Ellen said...

So funny that you bring up the michelan man again - Melanie and I went out today (she promised to blog about it!) And we were laughing that after claiming you were the Michilan man - you bought a white puffy vest at Target. We're just saying . . .

We love you so much we even talk about you when we're out! :)

Christie said...

You are so not even close to the michelin man! Will you stop being so hard on my new friend!?

My motto around here is that there are certain things that must be outsourced: manicures, pedicures, all automobile work, sheetrock mudding, and massages.

Tell him he gets what he pays for. :-)

tammi said...

Ditto to the above comment, 'he gets what he pays for!' Around here, it's hubby who gives the crappy massages. Not because he's wimpy or incapable, but because he gets distracted by the TV too easily!! During commercial breaks it's pretty good (unless he's deciding to channel surf), but not so much once the show resumes. It's very frustrating and I usually just give up and go do something else.

Martha said...

I agree with absolutely everything Stie says.

xoxox,
martha